Tuesday, 16 March 2010

I really didn't think...

...that men like him existed any more, but they do.

Now don't get me wrong, this colleague of mine is a nice guy, he works hard.

But that fact that he is CONSTANTLY patronising me because I'm female, that is driving me bonkers.

The way he constantly offers to carry/move things for me could be seen as a polite act, if it wasn't for the condescending smile and the "I'll get that love, it's too heavy for you". The fact is I'm actually fitter than he is, the man who is on a constant diet and has to use the lift to go up to the second floor or he's to out of breath to talk.

I also don't know anything about sport because I'm female. My interest in Formula One puzzled him until he discovered that Anthony is also a fan. I'm now a fan because Anthony is, not because I liked it myself beforehand.
The last time he watched a race was when Damon Hill won the championship, yup, back in 1996. Despite this, he is an expert on the sport.

Today he spent a good 20 minutes telling me which drivers and teams he rates this year, told me exactly why the Bahrain GP was so boring "not that I watched it mind, but they mentioned it on the news" and attempted to explain to me how a double diffuser works. Then he said "and I have to tell you, though *whispers* I'm not a queer like, that Schumacher has come back fit for his age. It's like that Lewis lad, he's a fit one too, not that I'm a queer like, I'm just saying"

Oh, Dear. God.

I swear the only reason I didn't call him out for being a homophobic know-it-all was because I was too busy trying not to laugh in his face.

Mind you, if he calls me Katie once more, I swear I'll do to him what I threatened at the Christmas works do - "If you call me Katie one more f**king time, your balls will be dangling from the top of Nelson's f**king Column"


Caron said...

I remember once having a real issue with someone who kept calling me love in a really patronising way. I took to calling him sweetheart. He soon got the message!

Your colleague will, I'm sure, be blissfully unaware of what a complete plonker he is. You could sit him down and explain it all to him gently but firmly, but then when we women complain about stuff like that we're often told that we don't have a sense of humour.

And are you sure that the biggest reason you are annoyed with him isn't that he thinks Lewis is fit? I mean.......

Caroline said...

Oh he sounds delightful, a dream come true and all kinds of wonderful... apparently we have to imagine such people naked. Does that help? x

Kate said...

Caron - he'd probably ask me if it was that time of the month. As for the Lewis thing, the fact he picked him was just the cherry on the top!

Caroline - I now need brain bleach. Gah.